Project Wolf Hunting: Animated, Terminated

I'm not suggesting that the sadistic criminals aren't way smarter than the bumbling cops in Kim Hongsun's ultra-bloody prisoner-escape movie Project Wolf Hunting. But there are still some steps I would've taken once I'd gained control of the Frontier Titan ship whether I was overthrowing my captors at sea or guarding the extradited passengers from the Philippines to South Korea. No matter which side you're on why wouldn't you...

1. Throw the dead bodies overboard.
2. Keep the doctor nearby to administer first aid as needed.
3. Handcuff the pilot to the steering cabin.
4. Keep someone alive for repairs in the engine room.
5. Retain one form of communication with the outside world.

Then again, why do I bring up such concerns when there's maggot-mouthed supervillain (Choi Gwi-hwa) enters halfway through to turn the smiling sociopath (Seo In-Guk) — whom you thought was the primary nemesis — into an expendable secondary character? Though it doesn't reveal the fact until late in the game, Project Wolf Hunting is a monster movie, an over-the-top fright flick in which the evil mastermind is a ruthless gay sex addict who fatally gags the man giving him a blowjob and the final three survivors are mutants who undergone serious gene therapy. Who's behind it all? A pharmaceutical company called Aeon genetics. It's the type of situation that asks: Can one tough woman (Jung So-Min) actually save the world from another military experiment gone awry? Or were Ridley Scott and James Cameron wrong?

War of the God Monsters: Cousins of Godzilla

The reclusive scientist (Kim Ki-Ju) has a crazy theory about an impending dinosaur resurrection. The daring reporter (Nam Hye-gyeong) — who's infiltrated his home as a housekeeper — sees his story as the scoop of her lifetime. The little girl (Kim Da-hye), his motherless daughter, wants to win a Blue Dragon Film Award by pouting and flirting and wailing. But no one's story — or ambition — is going to be as entertaining as the Godzilla-like creatures unleashed from the frozen waters by climate change. It's only then, when the kooky-looking creatures arrive, that Kim Jeong-yong's kaiju quasi-classic kicks into high gear. I mean, who cares about humans once this parade of monsters hits the screen?

War of the God Monsters is blessed with a giant lizard painfully covered in polyps, a many-legged dragon who has yet to sprout wings, an oversized bat pup in prehistoric Hammer pants, a triceratops who walks on hind legs, and an oversized rooster that may have wandered onto the wrong miniature set. Some monsters spit fire; others project electric bolts; a few can fly; at least one lays two eggs. At first the little girl is delighted by these oversized theatrics. Then quickly, she realizes that their show is rooted in demolation and decimation. I'm assuming she wasn't screaming for the airplane pilots to stop shooting the large lizards! I could be wrong. She could be a junior member of PETA.