The Old Woman With the Knife: Stainless Steel Is Gray

One of the surprises of getting old is that you get hit with ailments for which you hadn't planned. For me, it's been creaky knee joints, acidic reflux, and high cholesterol. For Hornclaw (Lee Hye-yeong), the aging assassin in The Old Woman with the Knife, it's waning endurance, a shaky hand, and slower reflexes. I can do stretches, eat dinner earlier, and take a nightly dose of Atorvastatin. She's going to have to perservere with her grueling physical regimen and find a kind, widowed veterinarian (Nam Myung-ryul) to stitch her up should "accidents" occur. Gone are those days in which her younger self (Shin Si-ah) could singlehandedly take out 28 men with a knife. Now she's having to resort to guns and a Spiderman-style rope to eliminate a gang of enemies who lack her timetested expertise.

And so, the illusion continues. We can do anything we used to be able to do, if we try a little harder. In fact, we can even adopt a stray dog named Braveheart and forge new allegiances with the "pest control" agency's office manager Cho-yeop (Ok Ja-yeon) who's modeled her look after Bettie Page, if we're inclined as well. But we'll also have to confront our messy past. (Career choices do make a difference!) In Hornclaw's case, that means facing off with Bullfight (Kim Sung-cheol), a bloodthirsty sadist who wants to unseat their shared agency's current queen. You see, many years ago, he had a nanny who... Oh, check out Min Kyu-dong's fun action pic and find out.

Unforgivable: Understandable, Less So

Directed by Lim Kyoung-ho and So Jun-beum, Unforgivable is undeniably a message movie about homophobia but what exactly is it trying to say? The film seems to be taking a stance against LGBTQ-focused prejudice yet it also recoils from labeling anyone as gay with even the likeliest queer man (Yoon Dong-won) being defended by his mother (Gil Hae-yeon) as likely to grow up and get married with kids if given the chance. Delusional? Unquestionably. Does it make for a stronger message if we confront the label of gay without any acknowledged gay characters on screen? Unlikely. Furthermore, were there misssed opportunities to confront internalized self-hate in the LGBTQ+ community? Undeniably.

The lead detective (Kim Jung-hyun) might be gay. His statistician sidekick (Choi Chan-ho) might be gay. An old friend who's a bartender might be gay. Et cetera. And while you're trying to figure out if anyone actually is a friend of Dorothy's, who isn't gets unncecessarily complicated as the actors playing younger, flashback versions of the characters unnervingly bear no resemblance to the men they'll become. And while I'm unreservedly thankful that the film producers did not resort to bad gray wigs and/or digital toolboxes for youthenizing, I unreservedly wish the casting agency had spent more time and shown more care in pairing up performers who play the same role at different ages. I would, however, like to commend all involved here for detailing how teasing quickly turns to tormenting, and how a culture revolted by male intimacy negates the love of bromance as well as M4M romance in board rooms and prisons and boot camps and junior highs. For that alone, Unforgivable is unforgettable.

Hidden Face: Caged Heat

What up-and-coming conductor (Song Seung-heon) is going to hire a replacement cellist (Park Ji-hyun) based solely on the USB drive that she's brought with her to the audition? And who wants to see a pseudo-non-consensual sex scene between this now-drunk woman and her new boss with the surfer hair, regardless of how pretty they both are? Well, whoever falls into that latter demographic is definitely going to get a little bit of what they desire in Kim Dae-woo's teetering-on-softcore, pulpy suspense pic Hidden Face> Because the two beautiful actors get naked and fornicate a few times.

Does the movie improve or deteriorate when the conductor's nepo ex-girlfriend (Cho Yeo-jeong) resurfaces then turns out to be the sapphic lover of his now new girlfriend-cellist? And when the two women are revealed to have a long history of bondage and dominance that took place in a hidden, soundproof room with two-way mirrors are we mortified or amused? Sadly, the only person truly concerned about the first girlfriend's disappearance is her ultra-rich momma (Cha Mi-kyung) who, naturally enough, funds the orchestra. That's okay. Because you should never underestimate the resourcefulness of a mother. Or the healing powers of kimchi soup.

Harbin: Revolutionary Movies

As the U.S. government slides towards white-supremacist, patriarchal fascism, Hollywood is not exactly taking up the call to arms with escapist fare like The Devil Wears Prada 2 and the new Michael Jackson biopic. Which is why we'd do well to turn towards Korea for movies like Woo Min-ho's Harbin, a 2024 release that glorifies the resistance movement that followed Japanese occupation in the early part of the 20th century. This is no hagiography, however. The rebel leader (Hyun Bin) disastrously lets the enemy free without weapons so children won't die fatherless when his Japanese counterpart (Park Hoon) would have gladly killed himself to save face. Poor decisions lead to mass collateral damage and a basement of peers are eager to take on the parts of judge and jury.

How do you defend stupid actions in a war? You often can't. What can you do to make things right? Revenge, assassinate, self-sacrifice, the usual. Although Harbin is very much a movie about leaders pitted against each other within and without the resistance movement, this movie equally belongs to its supporting characters: Gong Boo-in (Jeon Yeo-been), Russian translator and dynamite resource; Kim Sang Hyun (Jo Woo-jin), bespectacled, former POW with PTSD issues; Woo Deok-soon (Park Jeong-min), the pragmatic soldier who just wants a drink; and Park Jeom-cheol (Jung Woo-sung), the one-eyed, furcoat model and munitions dealer. Perhaps the underlying message here is that sometimes a group has to pitch in to remedy a mess made by higher-ups; and that being a traitor never works in your favor. As one character puts it, "If Japan writes history, no one will remember us." Then another rejoins, "When you're dead, you're dead." You might as well be true to yourself while you can. Because "we live in place of our dead comrades." Always true. "Korea! Ura!"

Boss: Meth Acting

Being head honcho of a mob isn't the respectable job it used to be in Ra Hee-chan's jopok comedy Boss. High ranking gangster Soon-tae (Jo Woo-jin) would rather pursue his dream of being a chef with a restaurant franchise; recently released convict Kang-pyo (Jung Kyung-ho) fantasizes about going back to school to study tango. The only person who wants to be the new don is Pan-ho (Park Ji-hwan), the son of the old don (Lee Sung-min) but nobody wants to elect that clown. He's stupid and has anger management issues. Family lineage no longer holds the clout it once did.

Four senior hoods with an unofficial leader (Oh Dal-su) work to ensure a smooth succession for this crime organization. So does Kang-pyo's over-the-top mother Lady Hong (Gil Hae-yon). But apparently it's not as simple as letting the next-in-line step up since two out of the three nominees want nothing to do with the recently opened position. Throw in a bumbling undercover cop (Lee Kyu-hyung) with endless spyware, a disatisfied wife (Hwang Woo-seul-hye), a grifting daughter (Cho Si-yeon), and another underworld organization called The Triad, and this screenplay gets overly complicated. Would it have been such a crime to keep the story less layered? When this movie shifts from "stabbing to a catchy soundtrack" to "backstabbing to facilitate dealing meth," the "say no to drugs" message is about as ineffective as when Nancy Reagan first uttered the phrase. Except this time, we've got incredibly effective comic bits in the finale.

Project Silence: Dogs of the Future

Anyone who thinks the massive car pileup on the airport bridge is the worst thing that's happening to them in Kim Tae-gon's Project Silence has some bad news coming their way. And it's coming on four furry legs. Because the military has been breeding CGI attack dogs who, through a series of unfortunate events, are now on the loose with a single objective: Kill! Who's in danger of getting chomped? A slimy political operative (Lee Sun-kyun) and his much more caring daughter (Kim Su-an), a professional golfer and her possibly lesbian assistant/lover (Park Hee-von), the long-haired, fire-breathing tow truck driver (Ju Ji-hoon) and his cute little pooch Jodie... Who's going to save them? Not one soldier with an armpad and a taser. And probably not the crazy scientist / mad doctor (Kim Hee-won). That seems clear.

Throw in a rescue chopper that crashes into the bridge's suspension cables, a fire that breaks out on the escape route, and a tanker full of toxic gas, and you've got all the makings of a classic disaster movie. Except the hero is a total asshole. Even when the worst happens, he's still needlessly endangering people, still thinking about how to spin a catastrophe, still pretending he's got the matter under control, even if that means lying, lying, lying. Well, he's made a career out of lying. Why would he stop now? It takes alot of horrible things to get him to reconsider the choices he's made in this life. Does that make the movie more misanthropic or more realistic? Your final assessment may rest on the choices made by one presidential candidate (Kim Tae-woo). Or not.

The Neighbors: A Real Nail-Biter

Everyone knows that taste is subjective and personal yet how do we classify those movies that we really like that we know aren't "good" by the criteria that we'd normally apply? Especially when we can't deny how much these films are entirely to our liking? I'm not outlining a "so bad it's good" scenario. This is more like "flawed but still in favor." Personally, I was enraptured with Kim Hwi's serial killer thriller The Neighbors even as I knew I'd have a hard time defending it if another viewer started citing all the things that this movie does wrong. Does the little girl (Kim Sae-ron) who gets murdered have a terrible wig? Oh my god, yes. Does her prolonged psychological torture make us feel icky as moviegoers? I'm afraid that's true too. Does the actress (Kim Yunjin) who plays her grieving stepmother overact? Repeatedly so. Is the running bit in which a magpie keeps meddling in human affairs come across as a bit far-fetched? For many, I'm sure it will. And yet...

Sometimes, it's fun to have a bad guy (Kim Sung Kyun) who projects hair-raising creepiness with constantly dead eyes; and a cheery delivery boy (Do Ji-han) who can solve a violent crime based on the timing of when the pizza pies are ordered; and a suitcase salesman (Lim Ha-ryong) who can lick a combination lock code into place with his nimble tongue; and multiple instances of people pretending to be on the phone and then having those same phones ring! Plus ghosts seeking posthumous justice! And for those who won't watch the nailbiting Neighbors for all these reasons, there's at least the presence of a less bulky Ma Dong-seok, in an earlier phase of his career, stealing every scene in which he appears. So you can pretend that's the one reason you really like it.

The Girl Raised as a Future Daughter-in-Law: Ye Olde Bride

Who's the meanest woman in town? The mother-in-law (Han Eun-jin) in Choi Eun-hie's The Girl Raised as a Future Daughter-in-Law is surely a frontrunner. Category: Shrew. She's what an overly generous contemporary might categorize as a Conservative, an overbearing woman who's constantly complaining, arguing, demanding, and, insisting that her son's bride-to-be (Choi Eun-hie) submit to their future household per tradition. And just how mean is this nasty woman? Well, when the fiancee-in-waiting gets sick, new mom banishes her from home and hearth. Marriage prospects, be damned.

Lucky for our rejected woman, all the townsmen are relatively kind. Did I mention this film is a fantasy? Her working class ex (Park Nou-sik) seeks to buy her out of servitude. The clownish servant (Seo Young-choon) will meow like a cat to give her a helpful distraction. Her goofy father-in-law (Kim Hee-kap) hires a blind fortuneteller to speak on her behalf. And her betrothed (Jang Won-bae), a boy young enough to be her child, eventually defies the mean mother. Will these collective efforts shift dynamics quickly enough? After all, the prospective groom has yet to hit puberty so this arranged marriage may leave him with a new wife (nee former babysitter) about to enter menopause.

As far as age appropriate casting, Choi may have miscast herself in the female lead in her directorial debut. Yet such a decision probably ensured her the necessary financial backing. To her credit, The Girl Raised as a Future Daughter-in-Law abounds with lovely touches. Some are amusing: The young boy can't untie his sash so he pee along the road. Others are sweet: This same kid offers his ailing love a piece of taffy after she's drank some bitter medicine. Delicious!

A Woman Judge: What's the Story Here?

Someone recently asked me what distinguishes Korean film. What makes it unique or special? To this, I replied: "It's penchant for turning on a dime." Hong Eun-won's wild A Woman Judge is a prime example. Initially, this 1962 movie seems to be a formulaic flick about a bright young woman (Moon Jeong-suk) fighting against societal -- and family -- expectations as she pursues her passion to be an adjudicator with an eye on the sisterhood in society. Then the movie shifts out of social justice mode and becomes about a sister-in-law (Bang Seong-ja) obsessed with getting a piano and undermining the female judge, even going so far as to set up her brother, the judge's husband (Kim Seok-hun) with a desperate, unmarried secretary (Eom Aeng-ran) who works for her feminist father (Kim Seung-ho) at the construction company. When batty, banana-crazed grandma (Bok Hye Suk) dies, however, the whole feel and focus of the movie changes once again as we're propelled into the courtroom for an old-fashion murder mystery, with the former judge as lead lawyer.

To be sure, your enjoyment of A Woman Judge demands your openness to dropping one genre (melodrama) for another (thriller) then another (courtroom drama) without judgment. Nothing is wasted as you go from one to the next: The sexist doctor-boyfriend (Park Am) will return as a helpful old friend; the disowned, addict child (Chu Seok-yang) of the mother-in-law (Yu Gye-seon) will resurface to disastrous results. Luckily, our now retired lady judge will put all that hard-earned legal training to good use when the situation demands it. Footage may be missing yet A Woman Judge is still three films in one.

Humint: Human Intelligence Vs. Meth and Sex-Trafficking

"If you open fire, there's no turning back."

That's the kind of statement that would immediately be followed by gunshots in an American movie but in the Korean pic Humint, Manager Zo (Zo In-sung) opts to follow orders by turning his pistol into a bludgeon so he can singlehandedly take out a gang of thugs while also rescuing drug-addicted sex slave Soo-rin (Joo Bo-bi). But has he actually saved her from the jaws of death? Hint: Pretty early on, Ryoo Seung-wan's crime flick refuses to adhere to the standard formula. Even the setting for this human-trafficking and meth-dealing thriller is out there: Russia's Vladivostok.

It's also got two dueling heroes instead of one: The other is North Korean operative Park Geon (Park Jeong-min) who's getting into all kind of trouble for his double agent girl Seon-hwa (Shin Sae-kyeong). Their most visible enemy is franky iconic: a bleached blond Russian pimp (Robert Maaser) who wears a fabulous striped fur coat and keeps his captured women in bulletproof glass cases on wheels. This movie excels whenever it kicks into action mode, whether its martial arts or gunfire. But initially there are too many long stretches without punches, bullets or car chases. That one fight involving Agent Im (Jeong Eu-gene) and Park slamming into the railings of a multi-level staircase is worth the price of admission alone...or in this case, Netflix streaming. The prolonged final shootout is killer, too!

No Other Choice: The Cruelty of Capitalism

The Americans make a brief appearance at the start of auteur Park Chan-wook's No Other Choice. They're a group of cold-hearted businessmen who have come to South Korea to dramatically downsize the devoted staff of a paper company, loyalty be damned. It's clear that Park finds the heartless "money first, people second" ethos as reprehensible. His anti-hero Man-su (Lee Byung-hun), however, doesn't necessarily agree. Or if he does, he certainly gets over it quick enough as he strategizes how he might get back into a high-paying job in his industry, in light of such ruthlessness. His plan: Kill, kill, kill.

Since this is a Park film, Man-su's deadly serious determination becomes horrifically literal as he systematically identifies who the competition before murdering them one by one. Changing professions is not an option. Selling the family home is not an option either. Competing as an equal has not worked in his favor so far. For him, offing his rivals is the best bet. As the title states, he has "no other choice." [His loyal wife Miri (an excellent Son Ye-jin) is more flexible as well as more adaptable but she's not driving the plot.] Once Man-su's masterplan kicks into action, the killings are quirky more than grisly: a shoe salesman gets twisted into a ball as if he were a bonsai tree; another rival (Park Hee-soon) is buried up to his neck after a night of excessive drinking; a third (Lee Sung-min) is fatally shot by his own wife (Yeom Hye-ran), a histrionic actress who's in the midst of a shallow love affair. Park's film may not have the constant cliffhangers of his earlier works like Oldboy and Lady Vengeance, but No Other Choice is nevertheless a powerful indictment of unchecked capitalism gone mad, both here and abroad.

Salsali, You Didn't Know: 007 for Laughs

Salsali, You Didn't Know is one of those comedies in which life would be so much easier if the on-screen characters simply said what they meant. Instead, when the title character (Seo Young-choon) goes to a duped acupuncturist (Kim Hee-kap) looking for payment re: just-delivered jewelry absconded by a scheming woman (Do Kum-bong), his lack of specifics lands him in a James Bond plot perfectly in line with the 007 paperbacks he's taken to reading avariciously. Suddenly, crime pops up everywhere he turns. The jewel thief is tied to a gang that also runs a disreputable dancehall; the cellar of the hotel is the site of a counterfeit money-laundering scheme; a stolen meal at a Chinese restaurant must be paid for by entering a boxing match.

Our hero may be thin as a rail but he happens to have a mean punch. He also has a thing for the mincing sister of the movie's femme fatale. He also has a thing for crossdressing... although his reasons for doing so stretch the limits of plausability. Well, at least he has a good wardrobe. Most wild of all, he has a strange gift for using mannequins to save the day, whether it's a nude plastic woman in a shower or a conveniently placed artificial arm under a bedsheet. I would never call novelist Ian Fleming a writer of realism but after watching Kim Hwa-rang's crime-caper-comedy, the derring-do of Fleming's British superspy feels nothing short of reasonable.

Microhabitat: Home Is Where You Crash

As much as reunions are a chance to catch up with people you haven't seen in awhile, they're also confrontations with the self. For constantly having to reintroduce yourself, means taking stock of your life, of acknowledging where you are at that point in time. Oh sure, you could make something up or omit anything that isn't flattering but then the reunion becomes all about hiding, doesn't it? Hiding from others and from the self. Each interaction is a lost opportunity to get real. Each sidestep takes you into the quagmire.

In Jeon Go-Woon's episodic Microhabitat, heroine Mi-so (Esom) has a series of reunions with old friends as she couch-surfs after losing her apartment rather than give up booze and cigarettes. No one she meets is very happy: one's a workaholic, one's in an unhappy marriage, one's unhappily divorced. Has Mi-so made a mistake by putting herself out on the street? Would having her own roof over her head make her happier? And who's helping whom when a cleaning lady comes for a sleepover? "My goal in life is to live debt free," Mi-so says while donating blood in order to scrape together the price of a movie ticket! Her heterosexist, manga-drawing boyfriend (Ahn Jae-hong) is equally strapped. Her parents are dead. A marriage proposal that could take her off the street isn't seriously considered and leads to a bout of paranoia (and a reason to move on to another couch). I guess Mi-so doesn't want to really see where she is or doesn't think her houseless life is as bad as we do. Then again, she is saving money! And her sole client likes her. Until that too passes. Nothing is permanent.

Omniscient Reader: The Prophecy: Never Quit the Game

I've been reading a number of disappointing contemporary novels in which the main character exercises minimal control of their fate so Kim Byung-woo's Omniscient Reader: The Prophecy is a welcome counterbalance. It's leading man Kim Dok-ja (Ahn Hyo-seop) is stuck in a choose-your-own-adventure narrative for which taking drastic action is the only way to survive. You see, he's been propelled into a scenario containing endless parallels to a dissatisfying online novel that he's been reading and recently finished. Now, finally, he has the chance to influence the outcome — as well as who lives and who dies — every time a new crisis arrives. Joining him in his postapocalypic journey are spiderwebby former co-worker Yoo Sang-ah (Chae Soo-bin), insect telepath Lee Gil-yeong (Kwon Eun-sung), muscle buddy Lee Hyeon-seong (Shin Seung-ho), tough girl Jeong Hee-won (Nana a.k.a. Im Jin-ah), loner Lee Ji-hye (Kim Ji-soo) and former fictional hero Yoo Jung-hyuk (Lee Min-ho).

If mentioning the biggest stars at the end seems strange, well, Omniscient Reader is a pretty strange movie. I mean, when's the last time you heard of a scifi pic in which heartless ETs set off a series of disasters on Earth so they could be entertained by human players in a live-streamed reality TV series / videogame? The metaphors aren't hard to decode. Nor is the plot hard to follow despite the reviews I read online. One villain is a politican! Another's a rich guy! Another's a sexually predatory businessman! And then there's quite a variety of lizard-like demons. What's the message? Teamwork and good friends will get you through the worst of times. And let's not forget the small joys that come when little kids mind-control oversized praying mantises.

New Year Blues: More Than a Couple of Romances

At first, New Year Blues doesn't look like your typical, traditional, ensemble romcom: When paralympian snowboarder Kim Rae-wan (Teo Yoo) proposes to horticulturist Han Oh-wol (Choi Sooyoung), he pulls out one of the ugliest engagement rings I've seen in quite some time. And yet... maybe that's intentional. After all, flashy diamonds aren't what love's all about. Travel agent Oh Yong-chan (Lee Dong-hwi) and his Chinese bride-to-be will learn that when his company's embezzled by a new employee. Divorced Detective Kang Ji-ho (Kim Kang-woo) will learn that while enforcing a restraining order for physical therapist Lee Hyo Young (Yoo In-na).

In true fictional feature fashion, all the stories are interconnected: Lee is Kim's rehab go-to and Kang has been assigned to Oh's criminal case. Even the one outlying story involving the recently dumped Min Jin-ah (Lee Yeon-hee) who flees the country for a last-minute holiday trip to Buenos Aires has loose ties to the other stories. Are their narrative narrative improbabilities? Of course. Would a Korean tourist in Argentina really hop on a Vespa driven by an old man who just happens to play the washboard in a cafe band? I doubt it. But I still shed real tears as everything started to come together in the end. There's something lovely about a man getting a pep talk on relationships from his exwife and a bad google translation bringing two future sister-in-laws together. (Nice work, Yeom Hye-ran.) And it's hard not to embrace the feel-good sentiment underlying director Hong Ji-Yeong's final images. "Next year let's be happier than this year."

Holy Night: Demon Hunters: Aerobic Exorcise

"My honey loves his exorcisms," my bofriend says to me. And he's right. I'm an easy one to please when it comes to movies about spirit possession. Which means I'm definitely the target audience for Holy Night: Demon Hunters, a film in which Ma Dong-seok (b.k.a. Don Lee in Hollywood) clobbers Satan's minions with well-aimed punches and his sidekick videographer played earnestly by Lee Da-witt faithfully records the fisticuffs for posterity. The true hero of Lim Dae-hee's directorial debut, however, is the silver-streaked Sharon (Seohyun of KPop sensation Girls Generation) who can instinctively smell out evil and has mastered the tried-and-true rituals for getting those nasty devils to leave their human hosts, without ever damaging her manicure.

Per usual, holy water stings, voice registers drop, youthful faces decompose, and rooms turn ice-cold as Sharon frantically works to get the parasitic spirit to confess its name in order to banish the ghoul back to hell. Also per usual, a loved one -- in this case, the devoted sister (Gyeong Su Jin) of the victim (Jung Ji-so) -- almost foils all these efforts as she battles her own personal biases as a neuroscientist and her naivete as a bewildered sibling. Even the subpar special F/X feel on brand, although simply turning the camera upsidedown is more silly than scary. As a fan of the ridiculous, I have no notes to give. And my boyfriend watched the whole thing with me, suggesting some simple pleasures have a diabolically broad appeal.

Even If This Love Disappears From the World Tonight: Heart Memory

Initially, Kim Hye-young's Even If This Love Disappears From the World Tonight seems remarkably like Adam Sandler's 50 First Dates: A peppy, upbeat young woman (Shin Si-ah) with anterograde amnesia embarks on a romantic relationship with a nerdy young man (Choo Young-woo) despite her being cursed with a memory that gets reset every morning. Naturally, since this soapy sad romance is from the land of K-dramas, the Korean version of this story has a major additional complication: The nerdy love interest has a life-threatening heart condition!

In short, this isn't going to build to a conventional feel-good romantic ending. Memories are made: a trip to the aquarium, a cruiseship under the fireworks, an afternoon of spicy noodles. But will any of those memories last? Sure her best friend (Jo Yoo-jung) is saving all the videos, photographs, and diary entries but can a recording ever be a true substitute? How about a sketchbook full of pencil drawings? Well, as the boyfriend's chronically depressed dad (Jo Han-chul) puts it "As time goes by, everyone's memories start to fade but what remains in your heart never changes." He's a widower so he should know.

A Mother's Love: An Actor's Legacy

The great actor Ahn Sung-ki passed away earlier this year. But my, what an impressive body of work he left behind. Who can forget him as the master archer in Kim Sung-su's thrilling Musa - The Warriors (2001) or the heavy drinking journalist in Jeong Ji-yeong's moving White Badge (1992) or the nomadic monk in Im Kwon-taek's brilliant Mandala (1981)? Strictly random examples from the latter part of his career! Looking further back, we realize that Ahn was nearly as good as a five-year-old actor in Yang Ju-nam's weepie A Mother's Love (1958) as he was as a 60-something legend in Kim Joo-hwan's pulpy The Divine Fury (2019), decades later.

The earlier film is pure melodrama: Ahn plays a well-behaved young boy dropped off by his ailing mother (Lee Kyoung-hee) at the home of his married dad (Lee Min) who knocked up his mom during a one-night-stand during the war. Daddy's new wife (Jo Mi-lyeong) isn't immediately taken with her new potential charge, even if she's been unable to have any babies herself. So will she abandon the child at a neighborhood playground or a nearby orphanage? Will she let him stay at the house then depart herself as a divorcee? If she's got any sense, she'll keep him close and stay put because Ahn has an amazing future ahead. Trust me. I've seen a good swath of it.

Good News: Tripped from the Headlines

The central incident in Byun Sung-hyun's gorgeously shot Good News is based on a true historic incident: In 1970, the Red Army Faction, a radical communist organization, really did hijack a Japanese plane with the hope of getting to Pyongyang. That's the kind of source material that has unquestionable appeal. It's easy to imagine it turned into a nail-biting thriller like Argo, a sociopolitical satire like Mother Kusters Goes to Heaven or even a weird, revisionist testosterone-fueled comedy like Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. And Byun flirts with each idea, with each direction without every committing to any of them. Because of that, Good News is a series of promises unfulfilled, an ambitious epic people with fascinating characters given half-developed narrative arcs undermined by a major miscaculation on the creator's part: Too much time is spent in the war room deliberating how to deal with this hostage crisis and too little time, on the actual plane.

What a pity. Because on the hijacked 727, Byun has assembled a a film-worthy band of terrorists: an inexperienced leader (Sho Kasumatsu), an unstable second-in-charge (Nairu Yamamoto), even a young boy whose barely out of short pants. They're balanced by a pair of wise-cracking pilots (Kippei Shiina, Kim Sung Oh) supported by a woefully underutilized, in-flight crew. What a movie they would have made! But instead, Byun focuses on the politicians and the negotiators, going so far as to include a preening first lady (Jeon Do-yeon) and a mysterious character named Nobody (Sul Kyung-gu). The hero of Good News turns out to be a lieutenant (Hong Kyung) who comes up with the brilliant idea to reskin a South Korean airport so it looks like North Korea. When that doesn't work as planned, I kind of wondered whether he was the hero after all.

Beasts Clawing at Straws: Survival of the Wicked

"The good ended happily, and the bad unhappily. That is what Fiction means." So quipped Oscar Wilde. And while Wilde clearly didn't have Beasts Clawing at Straws in mind, the 100-something-year-old epigram definitely applies to Kim Yong-hoon's enjoyable thriller. Which says a lot because there are so many bad guys vying for that Gucci bag of cash. Many are psychos: the madam (Jeon Do-yeon), the guilt-ridden lover (Jung Ga-ram), the loanshark (Jeong Man-sik). Others are more like infuriating foils: the foul-mouthed grandma (Youn Yuh-jung) and the jerky manager (Heo Dong-won). Some are just complicated: the indebted call-girl (Shin Hyeon-bin) and the shady customs official (Jung Woo-sung). The only good people seem to be the naive janitor (Bae Sung-woo) and his cleaningwoman wife (Jin Kyung).

If this sounds like a lot of characters, you're not wrong. And they're hardly the only memorable ones. For instance, there's also a cannibal hitman (Bae Jin-woong) who never speaks, and a dim-witted best friend (Park Ji-hwan) who you may quickly write-off as doomed. Yet despite the huge cast, Beasts Clawing at Straws is never confusing or confounding. To his credit, Kim has crafted an intricately plotted crime pic in which your alliances are constanty changing and in a weird way, justice kind of prevails. Granted, in a very twisted manner. Side note: One of the production companies credited at the top is called Artsploitation and Beasts Clawing at Straws more than lives up to that description.

Sword in the Moon: Let Your Guard Down

Fans of Dragon Lee specifically and cheesy Korean martial arts movies in general may complain that they don't make B-movies like those anymore. How wrong they are. For while Sword in the Moon, Kim Ui-seok's new millenium action pic, may have a larger budget, it's clearly hacked from the same cloth. Its plot of palace guard intrigue doesn't have much to impress but who needs meaningful dialogue when you've got swordplay, archery, horseback-riding, breath-holding contests, medieval torture racks, and decapitations alongside screaming, snarling, grunting, bleeding, and glaring. There's even a suicide and gratuitous nudity, although not simultaneously.

This is the kind of movie where if you really like it and are asked why, you might get stuck blabbering about the period costumes (quite good, especially the hats), the cinematography (uneven), and the fact that there's a masked avenger who turns out to be a woman. I definitely thought the scaly leather worn by the soldiers was cool but that hardly enough for me to tell a friend, "You have to see this movie on Tubi!" If however, the Korean producers staged a reenactment weekend and we got to don the ornate battlewear, I'd happily show up for the festivities. Packets of fake blood included.

Tomb of the River: Paid in Blood

This movie has too much stabbing for my taste. There's also plenty of — somehow more acceptable — men wielding pipes but these secondary gangfights always build to a stabbing so the pipe-brawls feel like they're basically teasers for what's yet to come. As to who's killing whom in Yoon Young-bin's jopok joint Tomb of the River, I don't know if it matters. Everyone's playing king of the hill here: power-grabbing Min-seok (Jang Hyuk), slow-witted if loyal Gil-seok (Yu Oh-seong), eternal second banana Cheong-seop (Lee Hyun-kyun), traitorous Mu-Sang (Kim Joon-bae), and the archetypal godfather (Park Jeong-hak) because where would a movie like this be without him. Most of these thugs are going to take one to the heart (via multiple stabs, regardless of rank). Interestingly, the best standoff ends up being a fistfight between two secondary henchmen. Kapow!

After the majority of ToTR's riffraff gets offed, the central conflict looks as though it might shift from gang versus gang versus gang to dirty businessman versus dirty cop. No such luck. The primary detective (Park Sung-Geun) has verbal swagger but can't walk the talk. A sleazy businessman (Song Young-kyu) enters the game late and leaves early. Stab, stab, stab. The body count is high. The final face-off takes place between exactly whom you'd expect: two well-dressed hoodlums. The underlying question turns out not to be whether the good bad guy or the bad guy is going to come out on top. It's whether there's really any difference when you're building Asia's biggest casino right before the next Olympics.

The Great Flood: Rain, Rain, Go Away!

An asteroid has hit earth. There's flooding. There's rain. There's less panic then you might expect. Will anyone survive? Weepy Dr. Gu (Kim Da-mi) has a shot since the robots are focused on rescuing her and shooting her into space. But if humanity must depend on this scientist to survive then we might be better off extinct. Gu has been doing work on implanting emotions while the robots have been working on making human bodies. Time for teamwork, in theory. But how empathetic is our heroine? When disaster strikes, she seems pretty quick to pass by other people to save her child which is, as she knows, a robot. Other kids in need? Pretty much a passing concern. An elderly couple in an apartment? Not even worth a second thought. Looks like Gu is ensuring the future of robotkind, not mankind. Valid to some.

The robot child (Kwon Eun-sung) isn't esppecially endearing. The special effects, I mean the tsunamni-level waves, look unlikely to survive. Not that this is real life. It's a movie. Or a video game. Or an apocalyptic fantasy (with antiquated walkie-talkies) intended to appease the A.I. overlords? Their representative here, bossy — none-too-bright Hee-jo (Park Hae-soo) — has been sent by some agency to ensure she survives, or maybe to ensure they survive, or maybe to forge a bond. He claims he can't feel emotions so I'm unsure how to interpret his irritability. System malfunction? Or how so many people can hold their breath underwater for so long. Or how a cellphone can survive extended time underwater. Or the idea that guns are the answer. Or how many lives I'd have to live to get it right. (It's a relevant thought related to Kim Byung-woo's loopy scifi movie that I won't explain because... Spoiler: Deja vu.)

Recalled: Amnesia - Past, Present, and Future

In the movies, it never bodes well when a rich woman (Seo Ye-ji) wakes up in a hospital with amnesia and doesn't recognize her dashing, mysterious husband (Kim Kang-woo). When you find out this married couple is planning to emigrate from South Korea to Canada very soon, your suspicions are heightened. This man is not to be trusted. When he says to his wife, "You didn't take your pills," you want to scream at her: "Do not take that medication, girl!" When he says, "Let's forget everything and leave," you want to say, "Run, bitch, run!" And yet you can't. You're seated in your living room. She's on your TV screen. There, she's left to her own devices... while having intense visions that leave her deeply shaken.

Are they delusions? Premonitions? Remembrances of her own severely damaged past? Neither we nor she can be sure. Two detectives (Park Sang-wook, Bae Yoo-ram) investigating the potential domestic violence flagged by a team at the hospital from which she was discharged are uncovering the truth as quickly as they can. Can these two cops assemble the case in record time? Can she put the pieces of the puzzle together herself? Writer-director Seo You-min wants to keep us guessing: Who did it? What did they do? Why did they do it? Where is this going? And what kind of medicine's been prescribed? Is being psychic a side effect? Side note: I gather she's an heiress... but to what? Where are her people? Surely, she has a personal assistant who could provide some moral support and a reality check... Then again, realism is so overrated.